Yo knock yourself a pro slick, gray matter live performas down now take TCB'in man. He's a menace to himself and everything else in the air Your cart is empty. Roger Murdock: Huh? Roger Murdock: We have clearance Clarence. Oveur: No what I'm saying is we can't land for another two hours. And as we fly, qutes still long hand plane quotes not know where we are going to.

Joey: I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defense. And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try Roger Murdock: The hell I don't. I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes. Ted Striker: I flew single engine fighters in the Air Force, but this plane has four engines.

It's an entirely different kind of flying altogether. Rumack: I'm not sure. I haven't seen anything like this since the Anita Bryant concert. Hanging Lady: No wonder you're upset. She's lovely. And a darling figure It's a shame you two don't get along.

Rex Kramer: Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked Of course you don't, no one does. It never happens. It's a dumb question Rex Kramer: But it's his ship now, his command. He's in charge, the boss, the head man, top dog, big cheese, a head honcho, number Rumack: The survival of everyone on board depends on just one thing: finding someone on board who can not only fly this plane, but who didn't have fish for dinner.

Jack Kirkpatrick: Shanna, they bought their tickets, they knew what they were getting into. I say, let 'em crash. Rex Kramer: points out the window There he is. Striker, you're coming in too fast. Jackin' me up Jive Lady: He said that he's in great pain and he wants to know if you can help him.

Randy: All right. Would you tell him to just relax and I'll be back as soon as I can with some medicine? Jive Lady: Jus' hang loose, blood.

She gonna catch ya up on da' rebound on da' med side. Second Jive Dude: What it is, big mama? My mama no raise no dummies. I dug her rap! Jive Lady: Cut me some slack, Jack! Chump don' want no help, chump don't GET da' help! Ted Striker: It's a damn good thing he doesn't know how much I hate his guts. Elaine Dickinson: It's a damn good thing you don't know how much he hates your guts.

Ted Striker: It was a rough place - the seediest dive on the wharf. Populated with every reject and cutthroat from Bombay to Calcutta.

It's worse than Detroit. Elaine: It takes so many things to make love last. But most of all, it takes respect, and I can't live with a man I don't respect.

Randy: Oh, Dr. Rumack, I'm scared. I've never been so scared. And besides, I'm 26 and I'm not married. Controller: I know but this guy has no flying experience at all.

He's a menace to himself and everything else in the air First Jive Dude: Bet, babe. Slide a piece o' da' porter. Drink side, run da' java. Second Jive Dude: Hey lookie here. I can dig grease 'n chompin' on some butter and draggin' through the garden. Rex Kramer: Don't be a fool, Striker, you know what a Long Hand Plane Gmbh landing like this means, you more than anybody.

I'm ordering you to stay up there. Ted Striker: No dice, Chicago. I'm giving the orders and we're coming in. I guess the foot's on the other hand now, isn't it Kramer? Striker: The stewardess said Rumack: I am Longest Jointer Plane Quotes serious. And don't call me Shirley. Note: those last two lines ranked 79 in the American Film Institute's list of the top movie quotations in American cinema. Randy: It's the little room in the front of the plane where the pilots sit, but that's not important right now.

Elaine: Doctor, Mr. Hammen ate fish, and Randy said there are five more cases, and they all had fish, too. Rumack: All right, now we know what we're up against. Every passenger on this plane had fish for dinner will become violently ill in the next half hour. Rumack: Extremely serious. It starts with a slight fever and dryness of the throat.

Rumack: When the virus penetrates the red blood cells, the victim becomes dizzy, begins to experience an itchy rash Rumack: At this point, the entire digestive system collapses accompanied by uncontrollable flatulence. Rumack: Until finally, the poor bastard is reduced to a quivering wasted piece of jelly.

Rumack: Captain, these passengers don't have much time. How soon can we land? Johnny: This? Well, I can make a hat; I can make a brooch; I can make a pterodactyl!

Steve: He'll never bring it down in this soup. Not one chance in a million. Rex: I know. I know. But it's his ship now, his command; he's in charge, he's the boss, the head man, the top dog, the big cheese, the head honcho, number one Julie Haggerty says to Striker: I remember sitting on your face and wiggling around.

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Retrieve it. TV Shows. The quintessential movie spoof that Long Hand Plane 05 spawned an entire genre of parody films, the original Airplane! The humor may be low and obvious at times, but the jokes keep coming at a rapid-fire clip and its targets--primarily the lesser lights of '70s cinema, from disco films to star-studded disaster epics--are more than worthy for send-up. If you've seen even one of the overblown Airport movies then you know the plot: the crew of a filled-to-capacity jetliner is wiped out and it's up to a plucky stewardess and a shell-shocked fighter pilot to land the plane.

The jokes gleefully skirt the boundaries of bad taste pilot Peter Graves to a juvenile cockpit visitor: "Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked?

A vital part of any video collection. Nominated for 1 Golden Globe. IMDB: 7. Screenplay » Edit Buy. First Jive Dude: I say hey sky, s'other s'ay I wan say?

Second Jive Dude: UH Elaine Dickinson: When will you be back? Ted Striker: I can't tell you that. It's classified. Steve McCroskey: This fog is getting thicker. Johnny: And Leon is getting laaaaarrrrrger. Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it? Captain Oveur: Joey, do you like movies about gladiators? Ted Striker: Because of my mistake, six men didn't return from that raid. Elaine Dickinson: Seven. Lieutenant Zip died this morning.

Elaine Dickinson: No. Ted Striker: I've got to concentrate Reporter: What kind of plane is it? Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking. Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue. Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines. Hanging Lady: Nervous? Ted Striker: Yes. Hanging Lady: First time? Ted Striker: No, I've been nervous lots of times. Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.

Roger Murdock: We have clearance Clarence. Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector Victor? Captain Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur. Roger Murdock: Huh? Captain Oveur: Huh? Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious. Rumack: I am serious Elaine Dickinson: You got a letter from headquarters this morning.

Ted Striker: What is it? Steve McCroskey: Johnny, what can you make out of this? Why, I can make a hat or a brooch or a pterodactyl Ted Striker: George Zip said that? Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land? Captain Oveur: I can't tell. Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor.

Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure. Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess? Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours. Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours? Captain Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before? Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before. Captain Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked? Barrie, Peter Pan. And I have trained myself to love it. Because it is only when we are suspended in mid-air with no landing in sight, that we force our wings to unravel and alas begin our flight.

And as we fly, we still may not know where we are going to. But the miracle is in the unfolding of the wings.

You may not know where you're going, but you know that so long as you spread your wings, the winds will carry you. JoyBell C. Pain is a sudden hurt that can't be escaped. But then I have also learned that because of pain, I can feel the beauty, tenderness, and freedom of healing. Pain feels like a fast stab wound to the heart. But then healing feels like the wind against your face when you are spreading your wings and flying through the air!

We may not have wings growing out of our backs, but healing is the closest thing that will give us that wind against our faces. Barrie, The Little White Bird. We don't have to like them, we don't have to be friends with them, we don't have to send them hearts in text messages, but we have to forgive them, to overlook, to forget. Because if we don't we are tying rocks to our feet, too much for our wings to carry!

Your objective? Get over it. To, like, save comrades or something. How to accomplish this? A: Take a running start, brace one foot against the wall, throw one hand to the top, try to hang on long enough for a comrade to either grab your hand at the top or for another comrade to push your butt up from below.

It takes team work! BKA bird kid answer : Or you could just, like, fly over it. I pretended to read slowly so I could "wait" for everyone else who couldn't read as fast as I could! When my friends were short I pretended that I was short too and if my friend was sad I pretended to be unhappy. I could go on and on about all the ways I have limited myself, my whole life, by "waiting" for people. And the only thing that I've ever received in return is people thinking that they are faster than me, people thinking that they can make me feel bad about myself just because I let them and people thinking that I have to do whatever they say I should do.

My mother used to teach me "Cinderella is a perfect example to be" but I have learned that Cinderella can go fuck herself, I'm not waiting for anybody, anymore! I'm going to run as fast as I can, fly as high as I can, I am going to soar and if you want you can come with me!

But I'm not waiting for you anymore. We can only fly with two wings and two wings can only stay in the air if there is a balance. Two beautiful wings is perfection. There is a generation of people who idealize perfection as the existence of only one of these wings every time. But I see that a bird with one wing is imperfect. An angel with one wing is imperfect. A butterfly with one wing is dead.

So this generation of people strive to always cut off the other wing in the hopes of embodying their ideal of perfection, and in doing so, have created a crippled race. They were like, remember to flap! To hear another soul and to whisper to another soul; To be a lantern in the darkness Or an umbrella in a stormy day; To feel much more than know. To be the eyes of an eagle, slope of a mountain; To be a wave understanding the influence of the moon; To be a tree and read the memory of the leaves; To be an insignificant pedestrian on the streets Of crazy cities watching, watching, and watching.

To be a smile on the face of a woman And shine in her memory As a moment saved without planning. I don't believe in fighting against the flow.

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